Online Dating Lessons
Sat Jan 14, 2012 4:43:09 am

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I was just thinking of that other post someone made about their relationship drama and thinking about how I don't really have a whole lot of that in my life. It's one of the few things I take pride in: that I generally have good decision making skills when it comes to romance. Still, I'm not perfect, and I've had to learn some things the hard way, for sure. Specifically, I am interested in what people have learned from online dating - this could be based on people you've actually met or simply have communicated with online. Here's a few examples from my own experiences:

1) I can't handle bipolar people. I know it's not their fault, but I have too many mental issues myself to really deal with this kind of personality.

2) Older men hitting on you is almost always creepy when you're underage.

3) It's very difficult to maintain a friendship when one person has a romantic interest in the other. The latter at least owes the former a kind rejection and the offering of continued friendship. However, if the other person either cannot let go of their romantic notions and/or disrespects the fact that someone is in a relationship by continually bringing up their interest in them, then they need to be cut off.

4) If it feels like things are moving too fast, it's OK to end the relationship. Why? Because it's hard to change people and their goals. If someone really wants to get into a serious relationship, get married, have kids, etc. right away, and you don't, one of you is going to get hurt if you try to unnecessarily prolong things. Let that person go and find someone that shares their same desires so they, and you, can be happy.

4a) Be wary of people who seem to jump from one relationship to another. If they become interested in you, it may not be that they genuinely like you, but simply that they like the idea of being with someone (i.e., you're not special!)

5) It's OK to have standards. And it's important to get both your heart and your head on the same page before committing to someone. I know a lot of people like to dive head first, because life is short and they want to live now, and I totally respect that. But for some of us, it's OK to wait until you're sure and ready!